Yep, you read that right. 12 hours in the car with our 2.5-year-old and 4-month-old.
We attended the wedding of an old friend two weeks ago in Toronto. It was absolutely beautiful, and we had a fantastic time—Until the next morning, that is.
On the drive up, we had a plan. And it was a great one!
We booked a room near our alma mater (about 6.5 hours into a projected 10 hour trip) to break the drive into two days. We wandered the empty campus, ate pizza, and got back on the road the next morning. It was lovely.
Now fast forward a few days, and it’s time to head home. Unfortunately, it didn’t even occur to us to plan a stopover on the way back. Funny how that happens…
So, there we were, on a 12 hour drive with our two kids under three. Well, 12 hours and 9 minutes, but who’s counting?
Now that it’s in the rearview mirror (pun intended), I thought I’d share a few tips that made the drive bearable for us.
Tip #1: : Prep Your Vehicle for a Long Car Ride with Kids
This is #1 for a reason. Save yourself a world of pain and frustration by taking an hour to prep the car before you go.
Here are a few quick things you can do to get started:
Clean out your car. Driving a long distance surrounded by dirt or trash is the worst. Don’t do it to yourself.
Set up a diaper station somewhere that makes sense for quick and easy changes. Ours is in the trunk. Include: A towel/blanket to lay the baby on, clothing changes for all kids, diapers, diaper cream, hand sanitizer, and a trash bag.
Put a big cooler in the trunk for anything you need to keep cold for the journey. Put a smaller cooler with immediate need items (water, milk, snacks, etc) within reach of the front passenger seat.
Make sure toddlers can reach anything they might need: blanket, water, milk, etc., and have extras where YOU can reach if you need to.
Bring Clorox wipes, paper towels, and extra trash bags. Trust me.
Don’t crowd the front passenger seat. Use the floor of the backseat, the center console, glove box, or under seats to store what you need. Things falling around your feet is just unpleasant.
Pack older toddlers a lunch box with snacks and prepare for a mess. Lay towels around the car seat for easy cleanup. Better a happy, messy toddler than a screaming kid on a long drive.
Tip #2: Share the Driving
Share the driving, even if one of you usually prefers to stay behind the wheel. On a trip this long, it’s really a safety issue. Be smart about when you swap seats and do your best not to run someone into the ground before trading off.
They say tired driving is as dangerous as drunk driving. Whether that’s really true, a long trip with your kids in the car is not the place to find out. Take turns and support one another.
Tip #3: Take the Scenic Route
I know this might seem insane when you already have a long drive, but I’ll always choose the scenic route. Give me twelve hours of a beautiful, interesting drive over eleven hours of mind-numbingly boring highway traffic any day.
Also, the kids are more likely to stay happy when there’s something cool to see outside the window.
Tip #4: Bring Entertainment (for everyone)
Everyone needs age and personality-appropriate entertainment to stay occupied.
For my husband and I, this is audiobooks, podcasts, and playlists on the bluetooth. Our car has that nice feature where you can skew whatever is playing to be louder in the front seats than the back, and we use it on long drives.
For the 2.5-year-old, this is a plethora of Daniel Tiger storybooks, a small collection of toys and action figures, and an Amazon kids tablet pre-loaded with toddler e-books, a few learning games, and a couple of episodes of his favorite cartoon (Leo the Wildlife Ranger).
For the baby, entertainment was a simple as her favorite doll (a happy-looking thing with little plastic teethers attached) and the toy she finds most interesting (one of those plastic ones with many things to pull, press, and teethe on).
Everyone needs something, so think this through in advance and pack to get the most mileage (yes, another pun, what can I say?) out of the least amount of items.
Also, don’t forget a portable charger if you’re relying on electronics.
Tip #5: Check Your Attitude & Don’t Be a Jerk
Nobody really likes to be in the car for 12 hours. Be mindful of your attitude and the tone you’re bringing to the small space. When it comes down to it, you can still be nice even if you’re cranky.
I’ve always found (as a teacher and parent) that kids reflect whatever attitude you give them. If you’re being irritable, they will be too. So do everyone a favor and fake that smile, or at least keep to yourself if you can’t stay in check.
Tip #6: Plan Stops Around the Infant
Plan your stops around the infant, not the toddler or yourselves.
Snacks, toys, music, jokes, and whatever else your kid likes can buy more time when the toddler gets fussy. And you? Well, you’re an adult. You can wait.
In significant contrast, when the baby needs milk, a new diaper, or whatever else, it will be nearly impossible to calm them without actually stopping the car.
So steer into the swerve (last one, I promise). Make every infant-stop a stop for everyone. If you’re hungry, stop to feed the baby in a place where you can also get food for everyone else. Need gas? Do a quick diaper change while you’re there.
If every stop is multi-purpose, you’ll reduce the constant need to pull over, shortening the trip.
A quick piece of advice from our pediatrician that helped us significantly:
Babies often cry because of motion sickness in the car. Stopping & starting makes this worse, so do your best to stay steady, even if means going the long way. If they become upset due to motion, a five-minute stop is usually enough to calm their little tummies (even if nobody gets out of the vehicle).
Final Words
Long rides with small kids are not for the faint of heart.
If you find yourself in this situation, do your best to stay positive. And remember, even if it’s the worst 12 hours you’ve ever traveled, the drive will eventually come to an end and all will be well again.
Power on, parents!
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