“The days are long, but the years are short.” Or so they say. I think what they really mean is, “The days are terrible, but the years are pretty great.” That’s more accurate, anyway.
Today has been one of those days that tests me, when it feels impossible to keep a smile on my face and a positive atmosphere for the kids. If I didn’t know how important these things are for small children, I would’ve given it up hours ago.
Now that they’re both napping, the two-year-old in his bed and the 6-week-old in her bouncer beside me, I’m thinking about this old expression and just how true it is.
If you asked me about my day right now, you’d probably get a not-so-nice response.
But, at the same time, if you asked me about my life? I’d be nothing but smiles.
Such is the mentality of a parent with small kids.
How are you doing today, Anna?
Instead of answering this question, I thought I’d share my contributions to this morning’s group chat with a few old friends. You can draw your own conclusions.
Me: *sends selfie with baby carrier in the kitchen* (see above)
Me: wearing a fussy baby so I can cook and get things done this morning. and reintroducing screen time with a Valentines episode of Sesame Street.
Me: *sends picture of cute two-year-old snuggled up on couch*
*30 minutes later*
Me: He just fell asleep so I tried to carry him carefully up to his bed but he woke up and we had the meltdown of the century. Now he’s back.
Me: *sends picture of two-year-old drinking milk on couch*
Me: and Ellie finally fell asleep so I put her in her bassinet and Yogi randomly decided go right over to it and bark super loud so she started crying again and now we are back to baby wearing while cooking
Me: also just looked up from sending those messages and now we are here
Me: *sends picture of two-year-old climbing in the bay window above the couch*
*one hour later*
Me: James is finally down for his nap. Since the last update, Ellie has pooped all over her clothes, needing a full cleaning and change (of course right after she had a bath this morning) and she also threw up in my hair
It’s real. It’s copied and pasted. It’s relatable, I think, to so many parents.
How‘s life, Anna?
If someone asked me this, I’d say, Great! Never better.
And I would be telling the truth.
I’m in a phase of my life that’s better than any that came before it. I’m happily married to a wonderful man, a stay-at-home mom to my two kids, and I even have time to write on the side.
Living the dream — My dream, anyway. I’m so deeply lucky.
Keeping Perspective
Take these reflections as a reminder to keep perspective.
Parenting is hard. It is so freaking hard. But it can help to remind yourself how truly good these years are, despite our little handfuls testing our sanity all day long.
Zoom out for a minute. Imagine the big picture of your life.
The worst moments in your day will pass. They will fade into the nothingness of mundane memories, lost forever with time.
But, the big stuff? The amazing moments with your little kids? The countless smiles, laughs, and first-times? They’ll never fade. Write them down. Take pictures. Keep them close and return to them on the hard days, or when they are grown and gone.
Stay strong out there, parents! Keep moving forward - and keep perspective.
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